I came home today
after a long visit in Florida. The ride
from Albany was wet as the rains poured down continuously. By the time we arrived home, sleet was
beginning to fall, and tonight snowy ice coats the ground. It is so strange to think that my Dad played
golf after dropping us off at the airport.
Sunshine and relative warmth kept him company for most of the day.
The circumstances of our lives can
be so very different depending on where we find ourselves. Some of these circumstances are somewhat
under our control. We may not be able to
guarantee sunshine, but a trip to Florida usually means warmer weather than we are
apt to experience in Vermont this time of the year. But other aspects of life are not so easily
controlled. What was meant to be a
vacation became the beginning of a time of mourning when my Mom passed away a
week before my family planned to visit.
I hurried down immediately to be with my sister and Dad, who were both
there, thankfully together, for such a difficult passage.
This was not the trip I expected,
nor was it the one I would have chosen, but there were elements of it that were
surprisingly positive, and healing in ways that I did not expect. Primarily, it was good to be with family, to simply
be together as we grieved and began to process our deep loss. We actually laughed a lot as we shared
stories about Mom and poured over family pictures. The laughter was not at all what I expected,
but somehow it broke through our sadness and helped us get in touch with our hearts. At the very center of our emotions was
gratitude for sharing our lives, and for being a family whose love holds strong
through what is a very difficult time.
It surprised me that the central emotion that swirled around us was joy
and not grief, despite the depth of our loss.
Being family, loving Mom, is a
shared joy that gives us the strength to come face to face with the powerful
sense of grief that we feel.
Essentially, over the past few weeks, joy often won out over grief as we
laughed and shared together. I imagine
it will continue to do so in the weeks and years ahead. The joys of a life shared win out over the
grief of death that parts us from those whom we love, and this is the heart of
the Easter message that I often start gearing up to preach at this time of
year.
